I.
Cannot.
Get.
Over.
It.

It's so embarrassing!!
I have to get it out. I only told Sabrinah but it still doesnt help me forget!
Yesterday morning while I was in the bus, it was really crammed with people. So crammed, that I was elbowing the guy beside me. I got on the bus and I had to use the ticket box as support so I wouldn't fall down. You wouldn't believe how tight I was holding onto it! When the uncle beside me moved, I grabbed that oppotunity to hold on to the railing but realising that I could only hold it with 2 fingers since it was blocked by other people, it wasn't much of a help.

When the bus reached at a stop, everyone had to move in so thinking that I could at least grab hold of something steadier, i quickly moved in. But shit, there wasn't much space and I ended up standing between two rows of people. With nothing to hold.

I don't have much balance when it comes down to fast, bumpy bus rides so naturally, I was wobbling a lot. The bus was nearly reaching its next stop and I was grateful, thinking "Thank goodness. Just a little bit more and I know I won't fall on this matt beside me". And when we finally did reach to a stop, the bus decided to skid just a little more and I wasn't expecting that. I collapsed onto the matt's chest and was stepping on a primary school kid's left foot and all the while I squeezed my eyes shut muttering "Shitshitshitshitshit!". I finally pulled myself away from him and tried to steady myself. Thankfully, the primary school boy didn't really care when I apologised to him and the matt got off at that stop. But. I did see him and his friend smiling to each other and laughing slightly when they were walking off. They looked back at me when the bus drove past them. Oh shit. He got the wrong idea.

!!!!!!

I put my hand over my forehead and rested my head there as if it could shield me from embarrassment but it was too late by then and most of the passengers were looking my way probably thinking "Oh wow. What a bitch. Purposely do that". Their kpo faces can tell.

I.
Am.
So.
Flipping.
Embarrassed.

Damn!