Letting go isn't
as hard as holding on
to something
that
wasn't

real.

Sabrinah and me wanted to try out for the teachers' day auditions. Yes, we know it's last minute and we were probably too late but we wanted to try. We got inspired after we started singing together. Dayyyyum, Sabrinah's got a really nice voice but she's too shy to show it and whenever she sings in front of people she isn't really really comfortable with, it isn't as nice as when she's comfortable.

So recess we were singing Run This Town and Disturbia. We couldn't keep it soft for long. Who can sing-whisper? A few people came over to see what was up and some were looking but we went on. Tiara wanted to join in too so we made a trio performance. After school though, Tiara told us Ms Shanti didn't want any last minute performances so too bad for us. I was mostly relieved because I really didn't want to sing in front of the whole school but Sabrinah was a little disappointed. I just really like singing with a friend. :D

We went to Tampines afterwards. We had to get things from Popular and Urban Write. I've finally bought my second copy of "To Kill a Mockingbird"! So if the person who stole the first copy from me happens to be reading this now, BEWARE. I'm gona make sure I write my name on it.

I.
Cannot.
Get.
Over.
It.

It's so embarrassing!!
I have to get it out. I only told Sabrinah but it still doesnt help me forget!
Yesterday morning while I was in the bus, it was really crammed with people. So crammed, that I was elbowing the guy beside me. I got on the bus and I had to use the ticket box as support so I wouldn't fall down. You wouldn't believe how tight I was holding onto it! When the uncle beside me moved, I grabbed that oppotunity to hold on to the railing but realising that I could only hold it with 2 fingers since it was blocked by other people, it wasn't much of a help.

When the bus reached at a stop, everyone had to move in so thinking that I could at least grab hold of something steadier, i quickly moved in. But shit, there wasn't much space and I ended up standing between two rows of people. With nothing to hold.

I don't have much balance when it comes down to fast, bumpy bus rides so naturally, I was wobbling a lot. The bus was nearly reaching its next stop and I was grateful, thinking "Thank goodness. Just a little bit more and I know I won't fall on this matt beside me". And when we finally did reach to a stop, the bus decided to skid just a little more and I wasn't expecting that. I collapsed onto the matt's chest and was stepping on a primary school kid's left foot and all the while I squeezed my eyes shut muttering "Shitshitshitshitshit!". I finally pulled myself away from him and tried to steady myself. Thankfully, the primary school boy didn't really care when I apologised to him and the matt got off at that stop. But. I did see him and his friend smiling to each other and laughing slightly when they were walking off. They looked back at me when the bus drove past them. Oh shit. He got the wrong idea.

!!!!!!

I put my hand over my forehead and rested my head there as if it could shield me from embarrassment but it was too late by then and most of the passengers were looking my way probably thinking "Oh wow. What a bitch. Purposely do that". Their kpo faces can tell.

I.
Am.
So.
Flipping.
Embarrassed.

Damn!

After school today, Sabrinah, Debbie and me went to LJS to have our final meal together before the start of fasting. We wanted to invite more people so I asked Debbie to invite Wee Siang, Dion, etc. So anyway, we went there and while in the que, I realised I wasn't at all hungry. I sipped on ice lemon tea during the walk to Bedok's LJS so I was pretty full. But I decided "what the heck, final meal. Best to make the most out of it". I couldn't finish up half of my fries and 2 chicken pieces. I was slowly nibbling on them with the cheese dip.

We went home after that. It was quite disappointing that we went back so fast, actually but Sabrinah had plans and Debbie was rushing home.

I discovered that 2 of my friends have gifts. Azrayna and Sabrinah.

Azrayna has this talent where she takes one look at a person and she takes a max of 2 guesses to know when their birthday month is.Like she did for me. The first guess was right. SShe guess Sab's too and bingo, right again. She doenst know when our birthdays are. I mean, how cool is that? I never can guess a person's birthday month unless I got lucky.

Sabrinah has this really cool gift where her dreams come true most of the time. She recently had a dream this afternoon and we're hoping it comes true. It'll be damn fantastic for her. She told me it's very very nice if it were something she liked but totally horrible ifit were a nightmare. Her dreams don't turn out exactly as she saw it, but it'll come out similarly. Nice.

I always have really weird dreams. If you had read my post some posts ago, you would know about the hanging heads and the recurring dream/nightmare. I need a dream dictionary to translate for me. It's so puzzling sometimes. I did a quiz on facebook and it said my dreams are "mysterious". I always thought it was normal but it might not be quite after hearing other people's dreams...


I'm not half full or half empty; I'm a glass half shattered"
-Tempo Change, Barbara Hall

My conscience has just been gnawing at me for an update. It shouldn't, but it has so..

Last Friday.
Yun Jia, Debbie, Sabrinah and I went to Long John Silvers. We wanted to try our luck at that lucky draw thing. :D It seems silly, but why not try right?

Yun Jia went off first, then Sabrinah. Then there was 2. Debbie and me went around Tampines Mall doing absolutely nothing. I have no idea why but we just didn't want to go home yet. Saw some Tampinesians here and there. For a moment, I forgot how to spell Tampines and spelled it as Tampenis. Sad.


Last Saturday
WENT OUT TO WATCH ORPHAN. ZOMG IT WAS FUNNNN!!
Okay, so if you know the movie, you know it's NC16 but we got Debbie's friend to help us get the tickets and we got through. :D Celine was panicking and asking Debbie and me what we should do if they asked us for IC.

The lady checked the tickets then checked us to see if we looked 16 or not. We were all pretty tall but among them, I was the shortest and I swear, the lady's eyes strayed at me the longest and twice so I tip-toed slightly just to try match with everyone else's height. She let us in and we very coolly strolled in.

The movie was JAW SMACKING. One, because it was horrific (not scary, more to thrilling). I kept screaming the loudest and I shook so hard when I was shocked that the other seats were shaking too. More than twice, Debbie and her friend smiled at me obviously enjoying the fact that I was so squeamish. Debbie said "Amalina!" in that teasing tone but I was so embarrassed, I told her to shut up. I was supposed to be The Brave One but I totally freaked out.

Two, it had some gore parts in it. Like when she... (if you don't want me to spoil it before you watch it, don't read this!) wedged her arm between some machinery (meant to hold the wood while you shaped it) and kept rotating the handle til. It. Broke. Her. Arm. And her bones crunched and snapped up. You could see the bone popping up from underneath! Dammit, that was so disgusting, I screaaaamed so much. I felt the pain dude, like shiaahhhh.

Three, it...wait for it ....... HAD SOME NUDITY. Okay, I picture people like Azhar and Dion doing a double take, eyes popping and images swimming through their mind. It had a woman whose chest has nothing covering it. Nipple and all. And a sex scene where the mom and the dad (not so old, so not too gross) started having sex on the kitchen countertop. Pssst, it even had the part when he slid his thing in her and she groaned. AHAHAHA! So am I grossing you out now? (; It happened, go watch.

After the movie, Debbie, Celine and me had dinner. Then we walked around and Zhi Wei saw us and he spat out his food. Really he did. Before that, his eyes grew wide and threatened to roll out before spitting out whatever was in his mouth and will never be again. Then he laughed so much and so loud, I had to laugh at him. C'mon his laugh his idiotically infectious! We walked around somemore to accompany Debbie to buy a new pair of shoes. Was it The Day Tampinesians Gathered At Tampines or what? We saw so many there lah!

Today
Day one without Shermei.
I realised I'm more independent without Shermei! I rely on her choo much but I'm still hopeless with maths so that doesn'T make much of a difference.

After school, Debbie, Sabrinah and me went to the library where I borrowed 3 books. They seem awesome so I'm looking forward to reading them. Yes, I love reading even though I'm fully aware that I don't look like the type who does. I've influenced Sabrinah to read more and she's influenced me to study more. We do good. B)

Then we made our way to McD's. Debbie had already zoomed to the other side at the traffic light and naturally, Sabrinah and me followed suit. But whoaaaaaa.

I looked at the traffic light and it was blinking green. I thought, Do we have enough time?. As soon as we took a step, it went red. Sabrinah and me both screamed a little and took a step back. The bus which was beside us didn't move so naturally we decided it was waiting for us to cross so we took another quick step. As soon as we did that (!), the bus lunged forward and we screamed (a little!) and took a step back. By the second step, i was frozen on the spot and Sabrinah (whose arm was hugging mine) dragged me back.

I didn't realise we were being watched but we heard voices of guys (Afiq, Khairul, Cherwin and friend) saying "Ah, jaywalk lagi! Jaywalk jaywalk!". I felt deeply embarrassed and bimbotic. So embarrassed that when the road was clear (but the sign red) I tugged Sabrinah's arm and asked her "Wana walk?" so we did. And Afiq, Khairul and friend called again "Ah jaywalk! Jaywalk! Jaywalk!". Aiyoooo mama.


Question!
If you were made to go into a Haunted Castle, would you:
(a) rather go in with instruments that can detect the presence of sprits (which might freak you out) or
(b) walk in not knowing anything withough instruments (might not be as freaked out)

Hmm?

Okay, so you probably know that we had the Council Investiture today so I won't have to tell you about it. I guess Naufal and I were pretty lucky. We didn't screw up (much) and had to improv here and there. Naufal said - and these are his exact words- we did things impromptu. Okay lah, so it was mostly thanks to Naufal who was quick on his toes. I was the one who muddled up the most (not everything ah!) and I was too blur most of the time to really understand what was going on. But I did come in useful okay! Naufal was way too stressed and wound up so tight he ended up rushing through the speech and panicking everywhere like his life depended on it and I had to be there to remind him too "slow down", "don't mumble" and "relax can?!". :D

So after school and all, Debbie, Shermei and me went back to Dion's to finish up on some project. I wouldn't say it was fun or boring but it was definitely entertaining for the rest of them when I screamed when Dion's humong-oh dog came rushing at me. I was freaked out. I'm freaked out by most things that bite, seriously. Then Dion (that idiot!) motioned his dog to come get me and when the dog got up, I screeched "DIONNNNN!!".

Sabrinah told me she and Yun Jia got this scratch-and-win cards and both of them said "Congratulations, you have won a Lenovo S10 Netbook (worth $899!)". They checked up on everyone else and theirs had "Try Again'. Sab went on fantasising about what she would do with the netbook. Ha! It's what you'd least expect but i can't tell you though! It's a secret. :D

I'm tired. I didn't get enough sleep yesterday. But when I got home, I was lured to the laptop to even bother about sleep. So there you go, an update. (:

I staybacked for Council Investiture today. In the end, I played volleyball with Vignesh. Debbie, Shermei and Celine came back to collect me and we staybacked to play ball and just slack in the basketball court.

Then, we took the mrt to Pasir Ris where we bumped into Wee Siang and company. We met up with Aizan when we got there and we waited while I finished my lunch. Celine and Debbie were pretty tired but that all changed when Aizan laughed and screamed out loud in a public bus (smth she would never do)!

We were going to the beach.

Okay, so this is when it gets better. :D
We didn't and couldn't relax for too long. So we left our bags and headed to the sand. We took off our shoes and dipped our toes into our toes into the sea. Debbie and me straightaway when as deep as we could without getting our shorts wet.I'm sure Debs will put up the photos. :D

Shermei and I felt nostalgic and decided to get in touch with our inner child. So we started making (what was supposedly) sandcastles. After a while, I couldn't stand making sand buildings and tried making sand-people instead. Who knew even doing that would make me sweat? Debbie made one too and while hers was quite sexy (understatement!), mine was pretty decent.

The two of us went to clean ourselves up. We had sand on our legs and feet. Then, we went over to the playground nearby and Celine, Aizan, Shermei and Debbie went to play on some gizmo that spins around while I went to play with the swings. I like swinging. Even though I'm (terribly) afraid of heights, I'll look up and it feels like I can stretch out and reach for the clouds. Oh cheese, it sounds like some National Day song. Eyerrr.

We went around and played with the other stuff and there was that spider web thing that Shermei, Debs and me played on. Like I said, I have a fear of heights so it took some time for Shermei and Debbie to get me all the way to the top. I was afriad I might slip and crash down. I gripped onto the ropes really hard and it was when I finally was able to let go, did I realise how much my plams stung from all that gripping.

I was so tired that when I got on the bus back home,I rested my forehead on my palm and napped for a while. I was half asleep though. I could hear the music blasting from the earpiece and I could dream a little too. When I did get off the bus, I rubbed my sore forehead which I put a weeee bit pressure on and I wobbled around while walking in a zig-zag. I was like an undrunk drunkard.

My mind was yelling for food by the time I step foot into the house. I swear, I was trembling during the first 2 bites. And maaan, I was chomping down so fast, Debbie and Shermei would have been proud of me. :}



Okay, so this is the sand people we made. Debbie's was lying on the ground and mine was standing up (so you can imagine the amount of work I put into that). I have no idea why Debbie went with the idea of porn and why Debbie stole the seaweed from my sandman's head.

Debbie's.
Mine.



So, who's is better? :D

Debbie webcam-ed with me today and she was funny.

We were discussing on what she should wear tomorrow. She kept on doing those silly jelly hand movements and covered her face even when I asked her to twirl around so I could see better. She was like a blind penguin waddling around learning how to stand properly. :D

I had a freakish weird dream last night. It was like a horror movie and I was in it. A few people were in the dream too. Haziqah, Fei Huang, Azhar, my mom, my brother, the aunty whose shop is under the block and her husband. Weird right? In some parts, their faces were blurred and soon it was from something ordinary to something I hope will NEVER happen. There were hanging heads freshly pulled apart from their bodies that were hung from the ceiling. There was a mad, ghost woman who was constantly moving around outside the house and she had a ghost son who looked around 10 and looked very sad yet scary.

Shudders.

This horrible nightmare ended when Haziqah tells Fei Huang and my brother to check around for the 2 ghosts and her saying "Wait, why are you so volountary? Usually, you wouldn't do this..." then she eyes them suspiciously. At this, I wake up but I know something bad will happen. I try to sleep again to see what happens next but eventually my conscience says "You think TV isit? There's no way you'll know what happens next".

But I've ever had 2 dreams which are the same except the second one had a twist, it had a worse ending. It happened a few days apart.

Shudders. What do my dreams mean?